August 2011
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i spent my sunday evening at starbucks attempting to read a book for fun but i got distracted. the book is great, the distraction this time came from having some guys sit next to me, they were studying and certain things lead to conversations. one is a nurse and the other a biology major. it was kind of a funny conversation, and for once it felt good to get out of my box and talk to someone. i...
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July 2011
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i’m not able to express how good it feels now to even do the simple things like sit at a coffee shop and discuss dating experiences. go for a run, have a sweaty back in the end. eat in your car all the time because you’re always on the go. falling asleep at eleven without a compromise and without a pill to help. having a glass of wine while watching old episodes of the o.c. going...
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i love the way your hair shines when the sun rays caress it. i love the way you say good morning and the way you hold me tightly when i cry and laugh at my jokes, even when i’m nowhere near funny.
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today will mark the last day of the semester that i have hated for the past month in a half. it will also mark the beginning of my summer which will consist of working more, and continuing to sleep less. technically i get one week and a half off with no obligations other than hanging by the pool, having some drinks, shopping, and enjoying vegas/La and not give a fuck about everything that has...
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part of me always wants to isolate myself. wrap myself around in a huge blanket and sleep. sit at a bench alone admiring the sunset. sit at a coffee table with a mug and a notebook. lock myself in my room to avoid human contact. yet, i hate being alone. however, i feel comfortable alone. i shelter myself away from complying, from broken hearts, from lies; i fill my emptiness with substances....
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i wish i wasn’t so shy. for some reason i can’t utter the right words to you, ever.
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sunday best by augustana
‘Cause I’m...
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it’s waking up to clothes piled up on top of the couch. the bed sheets lay scattered on the hall floor, the living room, and garage. old coffee from two days ago sits in the kitchen; it is a sign that no one has had the initiative to clean in days. empty bottles of wine; wine glasses shattered and piled up by the walls. strands of hair, mine, adorning the bathroom sink. sleeping pills, ash...
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27 by M.I.A.
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it's possible to miss someone you never met
there are times in which i try to find a resemblance of my eyes in those of a ghost. the ghost of one who vanished many years ago and continues to haunt every aspect of my life.
it is me searching to see a similarity in the way we smirk, in the way we eat, and in the way we laugh.
often times i just fantasize that you will come back.
that you will explain your side of the story and that i will...
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i need to quit smoking
too bad i can’t/ won’t anytime soon.
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someone to watch over me by amy winehouse
it was...
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i only need you
i always have and always will. you bring out the best in me, and i will never have the proper words to tell you exactly how it feels… it feels like you have it all when in reality, you don’t have anything at all.
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“He loved her, he loved her, and until he’d loved her she had never minded being...”
– Truman Capote (via ode-to-the-modernman)
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i have always been the one to carry other people’s problems on my shoulders. i have been the one who stands strong and never cries unless it’s for a damn good reason. some people think i don’t hurt, that i’m always happy, that i have everything i want. the reality is not so sweet. my life does not suck, but it’s not anywhere near perfect. i break really easily, even...
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she wept the off years of oppression off her back. until she wiped the tears and replaced them for cigarette buds. she changed her lack of knowledge for booze and a man and a warm bed. not a big house but yet enough for her six kids. she replaced the love for experience and never broke down. and when she died they called her the weeping woman, the strongest of them all.
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godscave:
Atmosphere - Little Man
a favorite!
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i don’t fall in love you said. almost wishing you believed your words as they vibrated repeatedly caressing your ear lobes.
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i want it to rain
for the simple fact that i am exhausted and the sunny bright day outside isn’t anything like my mood. i just want to make some more coffee, skip class, lay on the couch all day and watch movies and perhaps write music or sing… let the rain hit the window because i love the sound it makes.
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not seeing you today was the best decision ever. i’m not one of those stupid girls to drive miles away just to see you, and one who likes a guy enough to put myself down.i’m not one who you can fool and be a sweetheart to in order for me to have sex with you. i have a thing called self respect and class, i hope you had fun with your girl, you lying sack of shit.
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hiding my heart by adele
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i kind of just love you, in every way possible.. without any limits or any expectation of you ever loving me back; at least not in the same way i love you. it’s not possible.
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